That's what I'm falling for, he doesn't really have the looks, nor the money. But he seems like the loyal kind. 'Seems' because I will never truly know until I go there. Question is... should I go there?
I still don't really know what he likes about me personality-wise. He said that it was hard for a girl to like basketball, ok, so that's one reason. Another was that I am blunt and that is hard to come by, so yes, another reason. I think the main reason is that he feels he can trust me? Because I can be so blunt and never led him on?
Decision, decision, decision... do I say yes? At this very moment in time, I am thinking of saying yes. But I will have to keep in mind that I should hope for the best out of this, but expect the worst out of this too. The worst? We never talk ever again, I lose him. I cry my eyes out. I lose myself. Wow, that is pretty bad. Am I willing to risk this happening to myself? Do I trust him enough right now that he won't let this happen to me no matter what?
Is it time to take these walls down for him?
Take chances.... take the fall? Should I go for it? Should I really?
So much has happened between us. I have two possible answers to him:
Yes and No.
Could I possibly say no? Say that we should just stay friends. I really don't think so. But the reason I can't shouldn't be because I'm worried I'd hurt him because saying yes will hurt him even more in that case. I think it's just that I'm scared that I would regret never trying. Never taking the fall. Always wondering... what if. What if I said yes, would that be us now? I don't want to regret anything. But if I say yes and we fall apart on bad terms, would I regret it too? Thinking that maybe I should have never gone there, saved my heart from all the heartache? There's so many what ifs. I stand here and there's a fork in the road, where the two roads diverge. Which one do I take? Robert Frost, could you please tell me?
I'm scared. I really am. I think I need more time, and more questions answered by him before I make a certain decision.