Friday, 25 April 2014

Some people are like roses

So I had this crush on a guy, what, 3 years ago? I would notice him at parties, and sometimes I would even go through a bit of a rare Facebook stalk. He was a friend of a friend. And with how it is here in this small city, he was a friend of a few of my friends. He just never knew I existed during the first 2 years of uni. 

And I knew nothing about him, about his true personality. I could only gather bits from what I saw from a distance and from photos. This is the thing about crushes, you create such a beautiful image of a person and you fall even more for them. It's not love, it's infatuation. It's senseless. To my imagination he was smart and strong. But a few months ago, fate brought us together for 2 months overseas and I got to know the real him. 

He was strong, but not mentally, and he wasn't exactly smart. He was not the desirable person I drew him out to be. But he was kinder and sweeter than I thought. Either way, one thing didn't change, his appearance. I was still physically attracted to him. And funny as it was, he fell for me. Harder than the way I fell for him. Mine was merely a crush from far away, he liked me because he got to know me and see me every day for 2 months straight. He asked me out, I told him no, that I wasn't ready, I was on a break with my boyfriend at that time. 

Furthermore, I realised I didn't like him as much I thought I did. He was not the beautiful 'rose' I imagined, so I decided that it was better if I left him alone, let him be this beautiful untainted imagination. The untouched. Some people are just like flowers, beautiful to look at but dies when you pick it out of the ground. Not everything beautiful must be obtained. He is one such example.
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Monday, 21 April 2014


i love you by Lover-and-the-Wild

by Lover-and-the-Wild

This blog with be solely focused on my mind and thoughts... (on everything including fashion) but my personal fashion will be directed to a new blog: The Faceless Style 

I would like to take this time to address my issue towards numbers! Sometimes they're helpful, but most of the time they are happiness killers and just plain superficial. Let me expand:

- Number of followers on your blog
- Number of friends on Facebook 
- Number of likes on your Facebook profile picture
- Number of followers on instagram
- Number of likes on your instagram photo
- Number of times your friend has done something for you
- Number of times your boyfriend/husband has said 'I love you'
- Amount of cash
- Amount of cash spent on your present
- Amount of traffic to your blog

Every time you have an extra follower or friend on Facebook, or 'like' on a photo, you are happy, filled with butterflies of excitement. But it's short lived. It's addictive and you chase it... I certainly once did, and kind of still do. And it's so toxic. It's like a drug... to be chasing that 'rush'. And that is why I don't put up follower widgets on my blogs... I still get that excitement when all these things happen but I am trying to wash it out of my system, to remind myself that each time these things happen... that they don't mean anything... seriously, what does it mean at the end of the day?? The reason we get so happy is because it is symbolic of success, of influence, or power. But the flaw in this is that it's a interpretation of it, but isn't definitive of it.

*** by oprisco

I have been re-contemplating whether to put up a follower widget recently. But I came to the conclusion that an extra follower doesn't mean what you think or hope it will mean. That they are going to read and love every post you put up from now on. A follower these days usually just means they want you to follow them back and they don't really care what you have to say or put up. At the end of the day, this number is just a number and not a true representative of what you want it to represent. 

Saturday, 12 April 2014

Who Pays On a First Date?

look through my eyes by Rinksy
The rights of women have changed drastically over the past half 
century, they have jobs and can make a living. Career-wise, 
the views and standards of women have definitely changed... 
but how does this compare to the views and standards of
 women in the dating field?  

So women of our generation have become far more independent. They strive to be more than just someone's wife who stays at home and cooks, clean and raises the children. Women aspire to have success in their careers. Women are ambitious these days. To put it simply, for the past century, we have strived for equality among genders: What men have, we can have too. So the fact that we are now able to provide for ourselves, does that mean we no longer seek for a man that is able to provide for us? And in thinking that, does that mean the guy no longer needs to pay for everything? 
Because think about it, the only reason it is custom for the guy to pay for everything is to signify to the girl that he is capable of providing for her and their future family together. A key element of a good husband. But roles have changed and the woman is no longer simply the housewife. So now, for our generation, if we are to go out on a date, who pays? Does the guy pay? Do they split the bill? Or does the girl pay? At first I thought the girl paying for the whole meal was a bit of a large jump from the norm of our parents, but it's happening. My friends do it. It's actually quite normal. 

Monday, 7 April 2014

The 'S' Word: Sex

Olga tests by NerySoul
Olga tests
by NerySoul

I grew up quite naive, innocent... pure-minded... Ever since recently,
 I always thought sex before marriage was something I would
 never be able to handle. It was a 'no' from me. But as
 I progress through life, I learn that there are always 2-sides of an issue. 

I was raised to think that sex can only be for after marriage, and that's not because my family is religious. It's more a culture thing. Being raised in a quite traditional Chinese family. But I am born in Australia, and raised in Australia. So as I'm progressing through life, growing, and maturing, I realised that I don't live in China, I'm not a traditional Chinese girl. The Western culture has inevitably been rubbed off on me. I am a Chinese girl, born and raised in Western Culture. 
So up until I reached university 2 years ago, I used to judge those who decided to have sex before marriage. I mean, the portrayal of sex during high school was highly negative. I still think it is wrong. They were in their young teens, how would they know any better, than to just throw something away like that. But after reaching uni, I've matured, I've met people and I've learned from them. People in their twenties having sex is different. They are mature enough to know. 

Sunday, 6 April 2014


Time for some inspiration on shoes!
Moving away from the usual sneakers and flats,
let's get spammed with some more interesting shoes!

So far, in terms of shoes for everyday, I've resulted to either sneakers of flats. Those are the other two types of shoes I wear. Rarely boots or sandals. But I'm trying to become more versatile, because seriously, some outfits don't match with sneakers or flats, but heels!