Saturday, 20 December 2014

Take Him Home

Most reckless I've been since October,
reminded by the touch of the opposite sex,
and reminded of the craving of such touch.

NY by Khomenko
by Khomenko
Casually took home a boy last night. But things are not as they seemed. He was nice enough to send me and my friends home after our long night out, literally partied out until the sun came out. He was also complicated enough to want to stay over at mine as it was so late (or early I should say), where I gave him the guest room downstairs to sleep in. 

Taking a few shots, I hadn't partied this hard since October when the kiss with that other boy happened, and it still haunts me in a twisted magical and horrific way. To be held in someone's arms, someone you have slight feelings for, was an amazing feeling. To be reminded that despite the fact that I'm so driven in focusing solely on myself, the craving for the opposite sex can never be truly extinguished.

I like him, but then I have slight crushes for many boys. Just never strong enough for me to let them in, or for me to create an opportunity that requires such doing. He has a way with girls, some charm he possesses. But very bipolar. One time he wants to be really intimate, the other time he is completely detached and isolating. A destructive person to be close to, and someone I feel sorry for to be honest. His background is complicated, that I know, but he is very ambitious and driven, something I admire. It is sad what his surroundings have done to him. I wish I could help him, but that could mean falling for him. Something I am not willing to do.
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